As you go through your day you may realize that a morning which started off great has quickly turned bad. When days like these happen, we tend to look for an excuse as to why. We turn the blame onto someone, or something else. Does that sound like you? If it does, these tips to combat negative habits may be perfect for you!
No matter how much we would like to ignore them, we all have negative habits we could work on. Toxic traits we would rather not admit are there. Sometimes, these traits don’t just effect others, but actually have a negative impact on ourselves instead. Take a look at these 3 negative habits, and decide for yourself if you need to make a change!
There’s a saying that says, you should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger. Though this phrase comes from the Bible, it is applicable even to those tho are not religious. When we react quickly, without taking time to actively listen and try to understand another’s perspective, we often miss the point another is trying to make. Even if you disagree with a person, it is important to allow others to feel respected so that they, in turn, respect and listen to us.
Reactive people (those who react quickly out of fear or emotion), often only see the negatives in life. They have trained their minds to only look at the problems they face and focus on those. They let others and situations around them dictate how their days go. Reactive people are all about what has happened to them.
Instead Become Proactive.
Proactive people understand that everything happens for them, not to them. Proactive people are in control of how they react to the world. They are quick to listen and slow to speak. Changing the way you behave from reactive to proactive allows you more freedom over yourself and how you handle situations that arise.
We don’t like to admit this negative habit, but stop victimizing yourself! Playing the victim is when you exaggerate what has happened to yourself in order to gain sympathy or pity from someone. Maybe you even do it to yourself. Someone who plays the victim uses their situation as an excuse so they don’t have to take any responsibility over oneself.
I’m not talking about situations that may actually place you in rightful victimhood. Where you need to stop playing victim is in the little things of life. As an example, I went through two c-sections within 14 months from each other. They were hard, of course, I even had infections that made it worse. That would be okay to have a difficult time dealing with, however I let it control my life for a while and thats where I went wrong. I used it as an excuse to eat whatever I want, to not exercise well, to ignore responsibilities. Don’t do that to yourself. Playing the victim only truly hurts yourself.
Instead, Find The Good In Negative Situations.
Sh*t happens. It happens to all of us at one point or another. It is healthy to acknowledge what has happened, but it is not healthy to hold onto it. When you face a negative situation allow yourself to feel it and then move on. The way to move on is through looking for the good in every situation. It isn’t easy at first. We’ve trained our brains to think a certain way and it takes time to build a new thought process, but it needs to happen! How did I move on from my c-section mood? I chose to see how strong I really was for going through it. Sure it was life-changing and difficult, but I made it through! My body is so strong!
Talking/Thinking Bad About Yourself
The problem when we think bad about ourselves, is that our brains talk in our own voice. This causes us to trust our thoughts entirely and believe everything we think must be true. Negative self-talk can lead us into mental health issues such as anxiety and depression as well as limit our ability to see opportunities. It is difficult to succeed when all we see is what is “wrong” with ourselves.
Practice Daily Affirmations.
When you catch yourself in the process of a negative thought, stop yourself and try replacing it with a positive or neutral phrase. For example, instead of saying “I can’t do it!” cut yourself off and instead say, “This is challenging.” Even before negative thoughts cross your mind, start off your mornings with daily affirmations.
Daily affirmations are simple and to the point, positive statements said in the present tense. Affirmations declare a goal that you have as true, right now. You may wake up in the morning and say to yourself, “I am strong, I am fit and I make healthy choices when picking meals,” if your goal is fitness related. You may say, “My mind and energy are full of positivity,” if your goal is to block negative thoughts. Whatever it is, affirmations are a way of training your brain to make positive thinking a habit which takes the place of your negative self-talk.
Your Negative Habits Don’t Define You.
Although it is normal, and healthy to have space for negative thoughts (There is no rainbow without a little rain!) it is important to keep yourself from dwelling in them. Being reactive, victimizing yourself and negative self-talk are negative habits that do more harm for you than good. It’s time to change them.